Day FOUR

Today is one of the days I feared would come along in an attempt to derail me. Why is that whenever something suddenly turns to shit my first thought is of pouring a glass of alcohol. My mind seems to be stuck on a loop where it believe the only solution to any problem is getting drunk. At the moment I'm fighting back tears of frustration and I would give my right arm to feel that placid, tipsy sensation that more than just a few drinks brings without fail. You can't always rely on stability, but you can always rely on knowing that drinking will lead to drunkenness which will lead to hopefully forgetting your problems.


I am constantly in debt, chasing debtors to update my accounts or being chased by debtors to make a start on an account. When I wasn't working Centrelink made an error of paying me too much money in my account. They assumed I was going to claim for a partner when in fact I never did. I never requested the money they gave me. The last thing I need to be doing is screwing the government over for money I don't have.


So now I'm expected to not only pay them $1500 for their error, but they expect me to pay the amount in full, immediately. In full my ass... They threatened that if I don't pay up by the required date they would take money from my employer. Can they do that? I don't feel I should owe them any money for their blatant fuck up, but at the very least if I do have to pay them, surely they can't force to pay it all in once? Surely I can pay it in blocks? I need to pay rent, bills, I own a car which I'm paying off... I thought Centrelink were supposed to be there to assist and provide? Now that I have a job it's as though they just want to fuck me in my ass.


God I'm so frustrated. I'm tired of owing money all the time.


So it's not even lunch time and this is day four.
So much for enjoying my day off, I desperately need a drink...